My Grandpa's Ring

I was sitting turning the rings on my fingers, a habit when I sit and wait for something. And I realized this morning that my 'totem pole' ring could also be turned easily, which hasn't been the case for many years. Upon closer inspection I noticed that my finger no longer bulges around the ring, and the thought came that I might actually be able to take the ring off eventually.

I was 17 years old when my grandmother gave me this ring. It is silver, 1/4" wide, engraved with a small totem pole, the faces worn to almost nothing from almost 38 years of constant polishing on my finger. It had been my grandfathers, and one day when my grandmother and I were perusing her jewelry box after our afternoon of Canasta I admired it. She had saved it when Grandpa died, but now gave it to me; I think she appreciated my trips over after school to spend time with her, and now looking back I can see why. I have loved this ring since first seeing it, and it has seen me through many a strange escapade over the years. I think it's been about a dozen years or so that I haven't been able to take it off, and probably ten since I even tried. I remember thinking once that I couldn't stand how tight it was and the notion crossed my mind that I should have it cut off, but I couldn't do that to my Grandpa's ring.

I am so thankful that it is now loose, spinning freely on my finger, and the day I can actually take it off will be a day worthy of noting as momentous in my small quiet life :) Because somewhere along the way I think I had actually begun to believe that I was incapable of losing weight, that there was something wrong with me that kept me fat and miserable. Maybe even that this was something I was suppose to learn from, or that I was being punished for some past sins. Crazy thoughts of a mad fat woman! But those thoughts felt very real at the time, and now that I am getting smaller they have been chased away. I am still a little impatient, it's not happening as fast for me as for some of my friends, but the point is that it IS happening :) And I will be small enough to take this ring off and polish it properly before slipping it back on, I have every confidence.